When speaking to the bereaved after a funeral service, it is likely that they will be experiencing some form of grief. Read our advice on how to speak to them.
After a funeral or cremation service, you might find yourself in a situation in which you must speak to the bereaved soon after. It can be tricky to know the right things to say during such a difficult time in their life. If you struggle with communicating effectively with those who have just lost someone close to them, you’re not alone. If you’re interested, read on to learn about how you can speak to the bereaved in a much more effective way. Our funeral homes in Fontana, CA are always open and ready to accept new customers! We suggest you give us a call or stop in for a visit so that we can tell you more about all of the services that we offer. We look forward to speaking with you!
When speaking to someone who has just lost an important person in their life, your immediate instinct may be to offer up advice and words of encouragement. While you may have good intentions, we advise against this as it may not be as effective or helpful as you are hoping. Instead, we suggest letting the bereaved speak more. Whether or not they have a lot to say doesn’t really matter much, so long as you give them the chance to express what is on their mind. If, for example, the bereaved is not ready to discuss the death that has just occurred in their life but instead chooses to discuss something else, then we recommend that you go along and speak about what they are comfortable with. By doing so, you are allowing them a safe space to express themselves without pressuring them to talk about something that they are not ready for. If, however, the bereaved begins talking about the death or their feeling surrounding it, then this is your cue to prod the subject a little further. It’s important that when navigating this type of conversation, you are as attentive and open as possible. Again, it is likely that soon after the death of their loved one that the bereaved will not feel like speaking much. Not only is this to be expected, but it’s also completely normal and healthy. Oftentimes, people have a hard time discussing traumatic things that have just happened to them as they are still processing their emotions and feelings on the matter.
Another way that you can ensure an effective conversation with the bereaved is by asking simple questions in place of generic ones. So, for example, if the deceased seems out of it or as though they are struggling, then by asking a simple, “How are you feeling?” you are opening up a possibility for the conversation to go much deeper than if you had just asked a yes or no question.
When dealing with someone who is grieving, we’ve found that it can be extremely helpful if you work to express empathy and grief rather than just sympathy. While sympathy words to convey that you are sorry for a loss, it is rarely ever helpful to the person who is suffering. Empathy, on the other hand, forces one person to imagine life in the other person’s shoes. By empathizing with how they must be feeling during such a difficult time, you are expressing genuine concern and grief for their situation.
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